reminiscence

okay i've got so much to say but i'm not sure if i can remember them all.
want to blog it so one day i'd look back and feel happy reading it all over again :>

yesterday was the bbq the basketballers + some of the guys invited us to.
so nice of them :> thank you all!!
felt so happy because we were talking about the secondary school days,
the life, the teachers, the pranks, the people, crushes, problems, just.. everything that made up our secondary school lives.
ahhhh nostalgia~
didn't want to leave but we just had to - at around 4 in the morning hahaha.
really just wanted to sit there hoping time'd freeze at that moment we could continue talking about all that.

to think i had a crush on errol at the same time as tiffy and she and i cried to each other on the phone(!!!!!!!!!!!)
and that we could laugh at what was once a 'top secret'.
and how jj was thought as a pervert and (i think)he still is because apparently leopards don't change their spots do they? HAHA
oh and how meh crushed on niku.
and our petty grudges....
and how we'd piss the teachers off especially in sec 2 LOL
okay i'd just keep 'and'-ing because seriously, the fun we had? HAHA LOADS.
so many moments brought up i wish i could relive it the exact same way.

remember we had KENAS or KANES, then JAMTAB......
1/5 family, then we had this collage of our pictures put together~
and the guys were super protective of us. aww <3

and the guys are so gentlemanly now lor~
its like those kids who grew up toether with us.
errol peeling the prawns and sl constantly asking us if we were hungry and all.
and zf passing us satay and all!
plus they were so cute and it was super heartwarming to see them taupok each other!
HAHA and they proceeded to 'rape' one another.
so cute like kids <3
anyway one thing's for sure:
i'd never want to lose any of you guys as friends :>
hope the feeling's mutual huh HEHE.

on to the sad part......
i think i'm not exactly over you yet.
seeing you yesterday just proved that point.
sometimes i wonder how you seem to feel fine when i'm not even close to feeling fine.
i guess it was right i gave up on you because it was time i actually realised you didn't feel a thing :>
maybe i'm wrong(hope i am), but i guess it takes more than just time.
willpower maybe. or maybe i just don't wna forget you somewhere inside of me.
i don't know myself.
but rest assured i will eventually.
tiffy told me something like this:
'you never really stop loving someone, because if you do, you never really loved him before'
true. for me, at least.
used to think what life'd be without you and i cringed.
because i couldn't imagine what it'd really be.

but now i don't need to imagine.
because i know that what was there for me to fall back on then wouldn't be there for me ever again.
to think i teared on the bus alone on the way home.
all that's left of us were the happy memories.
i hope you don't forget them because that was our last promise :>
-
pictures up when i get them from tiffy!
no group pics though.

stupid pile of work.
ALL UNDONE WOOHOO YAY ME IM AWESOME~
shall go jog later. really need to lose some fats.
breakfast at tiffany's(HAHAHA) was awesome hehe. bacon on toast yumz :>