brought upon myself

ya thought youd be understanding enough to shut your gap and not ask since i alr told you not to.
thought youd be experienced enough to feel what ive been thru.
it ended on the 20th/21st.

and i thought id give myself some time to get over it and be okay enough to tell you the truth and type that msg w/o crying.
and i did. i was strong enough to do that.
thr you were. assuming, asking and probing.
poking your nose into smth so sensitive, up till now i dont want to go into detail.

sch's so hectic, spamming us w all the projects and assignments like we've nv done any bfr.
slpg hrs hv to be weird and unearthly almost everyday.
i reach home and sometimes i get so tired i dont even shower bfr i fall aslp on the floor.
i get up ard mindnight to 2plus, stay up all the way til morning.
for what?
FOR MY SCH WORK AND NOT BECAUSE IM WHINING, HARPING ON AND ON AND PINING FOR WHATS LOST TO COME BACK.

i wasnt crying or anything.
and the reason i dont feel like tlkg to you is because i knw youd ask.
AND I DONT WANT THAT JUST YET.
plus i dont like to tlk when im tired.
everyones irritable when they're tired.
all im asking fo is jst a little bit of patience, understanding and if possible, a little sympathy.

AND WHAT I GOT EARLY THIS MORNING WAS:
YOU RANTING AT THE TOP OF YOUR VOICE ABT HOW IM TOO YOUNG TO HANDLE RELATIONSHIPS, HOW IM SO SAD (YOUR ASSUMPTION BTW) TIL IM CRYING AND HIDING AWAY FROM THE WORLD, HOW I SHOULD HEAD TO HIS HOUSE AND CRY DWNSTRS TIL I SEE HIM.

I FUCKING TELL YOU.
I WONT LET MYSELF GET SO AFFECTED AND I CAN FUCKING SWEAR TO THAT.
WHAT IS HE TO ME NOW THAT I HAVE TO DO STUPID ACTS TO GAIN PITY?

DONT ASSUME.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE GG TO BE CARING ENOUGH TO UNDERSTAND AND NOT ASK.
MAYBE EVEN TRY TO CHEER ME UP BY A BIT.
but i was given none of that but a lecture.
ENOUGH.

lectures are aplenty when i head to sch i fucking dont need any at home.