You've got the love I need to see me through

" While they like to talk everything through, to analyze and hypothesize, what I really need, what I'm really looking for, is not something I can articulate. Its's nonverbal : I need love. I need the thing that happens when your brains shuts off and your heart turns on.

And I know it's around me somewhere, but I just can't feel it.

What I do feel is the scariness of being alone in this huge loft. I'm sure that I have nowhere to run, that I can't even walk anywhere without tripping or falling way down, and I know I want out of this mess. I want out, No one will ever love me, I will live and die alone, I will go nowhere fast, I will be nothing at all. Nothing will work out. The promise that on the other side of all this lies a beautiful life, one worth surviving suicide for, will have turned out wrong. It will all be a big dupe. "